Together
by EkikaMess
Summary: After the massacre at Mount Weather, Clarke sets out on her own. She doesn't expect her friends to find her in the midst of her self imposed mission.
1. Chapter 1

She wiped the sweat from her brow, the sun was beating down on her back and her muscles were close to total failure. "Only 100 more. I have to do this." She resumed digging, nothing but her self imposed mission on her mind.

By the time the sun sank behind Mount Weather and the temperature dropped, she had finished digging graves for almost 20 more mountain men. She had been digging graves from sun up til sun down for a week now, determined to put those she murdered to rest. The children's graves were done the first day. She was able to dig all 47 pint sized graves while the sun was shining, the hardest part was laying them into their final bed. When the sun sank on that first day, she cried. She cried and considered everything she had done since the 100 had made land fall. All those friends she lost; Wells, Charlotte, Finn, Anya and all those she gained; Bellamy, Octavia, Lincoln, Raven. Then all those she took from others; the mountain men, the grounder village. She was surprised the rivers didn't run red with all the blood spilled.

She spent her nights sleeping just inside the Mountain door, the door they worked so hard to open, she slept upright against the wall, never deep enough to get some true rest.

The crunching of gravel roused her from her shallow sleep. The sun was going to be up soon and she had visitors.

"Clarke?!" a familiar voice shouted. "Clarke! I know you're here."

"Bellamy, what are you doing here? I told you to look after... them." her steps faltered as she spied the group he brought with him. Lincoln, Monty, Octavia, Kane, Jasper and Miller were all there.

"We tried the grounder camp first, they said you were there a week ago. That you told them the mountain men wouldn't be a danger anymore then you left. We tried the bunker Finn found, and Lincoln's caves... I should have known you'd come here. What have you been doing, Clarke?"

She led them wordlessly to the graveyard she had started. It was surrounded by beauty, it overlooked the river and valley while being shadowed by the mountain. "Wild flowers will grow here by next year. They lived and died inside the mountain. I didn't want to take them too far from the only place they've ever known, but I wanted them to have eternity to be outside." Her voice sounded raw and hollow. "I didn't know their burial customs. This was the best I could think of."

The group stood in silence, staring at the mounds, each marked with a Mount Weather ID card. Jasper saw Maya's and sat at the base of her grave. She was the first to be buried after the children.

"This is fine. It's not like she'll- they'll mind either way." Jasper said through tears, picking up and tossing gravel to distract himself.

After a few minutes, Clarke picked her shovel back up and started digging a new row. Bellamy laid his hand on her arm, a questioning look in his eyes. "There are still more. I can't stop now. I am almost done. Please. I can't stop." she said almost frantically.

"Alright," Kane finally spoke, "Where can we find more shovels? We'll help put them all to rest."

"I know where they are." Jasper said. Monty, Miller, and Kane followed Jasper into the mountain.

"Eat." Bellamy demanded.

"I'll eat later. I have to finish this."

"No. You'll eat now. I'll dig." They stood toe to toe, arguing through their eyes. Clarke, worn down from little rest and even less food, was no match for his stubbornness this time.

"Just eat, Clarke. He has been on a mission to find you since the day after you left. The least you can do is listen to him." Octavia said begrudgingly, not making eye contact.

Lincoln handed Clarke some jerky, fruit, and a canteen. The three ate in awkward silence as they listened to the macabre rhythmic sound of Bellamy digging.

After a few minutes Clarke asked, "How's my mom? And Raven?"

"Your mom started developing an infection, but we were able to get it under control before it got too far. She is still recovering. Raven's almost fully recovered." Lincoln said gently.

"She's pissed they drilled into her good leg. Wick made her two new braces, one for each leg. He told her it was 'just in case'. He was still limping when we joined Bellamy two days ago." Octavia smirked.

Clarke almost smiled. "Good to hear they are getting better. Thank you." she paused a moment. "Both of you. For everything. You may never forgive me for not warning the village about the rockets, and that is fine, but I am grateful for all you've done."

"Are you coming back to camp with us?" Octavia asked

"I don't think I can. Wherever I go, death follows. I have caused enough death. I think it's best I stay far away from those I care about." she looked at Bellamy, who was wiping sweat from his forehead. He took a swig from his canteen then walked toward the small group.

"I don't know how you've done all this alone, Clarke. You shouldn't have had to. We both pulled the lever, I need to do this, too. We needed to do this together."

He sat down next to her, his thigh almost against hers. She wanted to cuddle into him, to accept his offer and let him lighten her burden, just a bit. But then what kind of person- what kind of leader- would that make her?

He reached down to her clasped hands and took one into his. They looked at each other for a moment, saying everything they needed to say with their eyes.

I'm here. It's ok.

_I know. I'm sorry._

Don't run from me.

_I'm scared._

We can get through this together.

_Together._

The rest of the group returned with four more shovels. "This is all we could find. We can dig in shifts. I counted 76 people left on level 5. We should be able to finish their graves in the next two days." Kane said.

Clarke released Bellamy's hand and stood, her muscles screaming in protest, picked up a shovel and went back to digging. The group took turns digging, and when they weren't digging they were making crosses for the graves like they did at their landing site. As the sun went behind the mountain, they brought out 36 more corpses and placed one in each newly dug grave.

"Thank you all for your help. You didn't need to come out here." Clarke said humbly. She just couldn't look at any of them without remembering the pain she has caused each of them in the past three months.

"Let's eat and rest." Kane said.

They congregated just inside the door, seeking shelter, but refusing to impose on those still awaiting burial on level five. Lincoln made a fire and they all ate in silence. Clarke could see Monty and Jasper were not the same, they sat on opposite side of the flame and rarely made eye contact. There were no jokes or laughs or conspiring looks. She was disheartened. Those two used to be inseparable; now, because of her, they can hardly stand to be on the same continent. She felt she had to find some way to make at least this one thing right, those two boys were soul mates, not in the romantic sense, but in the sense that they fit so well together, you can't imagine one without the other. Jasper needed his other half to help him grieve, but he didn't want to forgive Monty yet.

"Jasper, Monty, can I talk to you two for a minute? Please." The boys stood begrudgingly and met her outside. "This has got to stop. You two are like brothers. Jasper, I know you're angry with him because he programmed the reverse air flow, but it wasn't him who pulled the switch. It was _me. _And Monty. What the hell? I know you feel guilty, but the blame is on _me_ again. I did this. I killed them all."

Bellamy walked up behind Clarke. "We. You keep forgetting that _we_ did this. Together. I placed my hand on yours," Bellamy grabbed her hand, "I looked you in this eyes and we pulled that lever together. You keep neglecting to remember my part in all this. Surprise, Princess, not everything is your fault." He was invading her space, looking down into her eyes. "And you two," he looked at Jasper and Monty, "Work your shit out. You are stressing everyone out with your cold shoulder routine, even back at camp. Yell it out, punch it out, cry it out, whatever. Just work it out."

Jasper and Monty looked at each other almost bashfully, "Well, lets go cry it out." Monty chuckled and they walked off to reestablish their friendship.

"I had it handled, you know? You didn't need to come out here." She said indignantly.

"You seem determined to make everyone hate you, Clarke. I am not ok with that. I did need to come. You are heading down a path of self destruction and you seem determined to reach the finish line. You are so busy hating yourself, you can't see that no one else does. We will finish burying the dead tomorrow, we will give them all a burial service, and we will go home. Back to camp. They need you there. I need you." He caressed her cheek with his free hand and she leaned into it. "Let's go back inside and get some rest. We'll need it."

At Monty's scream, rest was forgotten.


	2. Chapter 2

Everyone sprung into action. Bellamy grabbed his gun, Octavia and Lincoln pulled out their knives, and everyone else grabbed a shovel. They rounded a stone outcropping to find Jasper laughing at Monty so hard he was doubled over. Monty was dusting off his pants and mumbling to himself.

"What the hell happened here?" Kane demanded, out of breath from the adrenaline and short run.

"I thought I heard something in the trees. I looked toward the noise and tripped over a log." Monty said, still dusting himself angrily. "I am glad I could entertain you, Jasper. Take a breath before you keel over."

"Ok, everyone, let's get back inside." Bellamy said, eyeing the tree line. The grounders would have no reason for coming to the mountain and the only people from the Ark that should be there were the ones that were sitting around the fire earlier. The noise could have been an animal, but Bellamy had a feeling it was more sinister than that. The group walked back to their makeshift camp just inside the door, more alert than before.

"This doesn't feel right." Clarke said. "

"You're right," Octavia glanced at Lincoln, "there is someone out there. We don't know if it's friend, foe, or stranger. We need to have a sentry until we get back to camp." Lincoln nodded, agreeing to take the first shift.

They sat around the fire again, this time, Jasper and Monty sat next to Miller, chatting easily. It wasn't the rambunctious camaraderie they had before , but it was progress. Kane, Octavia, Clarke and Bellamy shared worried glances.

"Who do you think it was? Grounders?" Kane asked.

""No," Clarke said, "at least not one that stormed the mountain with us. Lexa now knows that the mountain is no longer a concern. Unless some of the other tribes are scouting this place for a land grab? Now that the mountain men are neutralized, the mountain and it's surrounding area are unclaimed territory."

"That's possible, but it also could have been a nomad. A loner." Octavia suggested.

"Is it possible there are any mountain men left? Did you find Emerson's body?" Bellamy asked Clarke.

"He ran when we reversed the air flow. I haven't seen him since." She looked broken and worried.

"We'll scout the woods at daylight. If there is any evidence someone was there, we'll find it." Kane said. "Monty, tomorrow can you show me where the noise came from?"

"No!" Clarke interrupted. "No. We finish the graves tomorrow. We are so close. Once we finish we can leave this mountain. Forever. We'll let everyone else fight over it. I am done killing."

Bellamy grabbed her hand again. Clarke had no idea when he decided he could just hold her hand whenever he wanted, but she was grateful he had. She started stroking her thumb over his and felt his hand squeeze in answer. Bellamy seemed to need the contact just and much as she did. They all got quiet and stared at the fire, almost hypnotized.

"I'll take next shift." Kane called to Lincoln after a while. "Everyone else, get some rest. It's going to be a long day tomorrow."

Exhausted, Clarke went to the wall and sat in the same position she had been sleeping in for days. Bellamy sat next to her and they fell to sleep leaning against each other. When Kane woke Bellamy up for the third shift of watch, Clarke woke up too.

"Your mother misses you, you know." He said to her.

"I miss her too. How is she doing? Are they sure the infection is gone?"

"She is doing alright. The streaking has disappeared and her fever broke. All signs show that the infection is gone. How are you holding up?"

"I am surviving. I feel like Atlas, the world on my shoulders. At least while I was out here alone I didn't have to put on a face and act like my soul hasn't been shattered. I know. I made an impossible choice in an impossible situation." She looked at Kane, "I guess I can understand the council members a bit more now. Willfully taking lives, so many lives, is so hard. Will I ever be able to put myself back together? Have you?"

"Reassembling yourself is like trying to repair a shattered vase. You can glue it back together, but you can still see the cracks and there may be pieces still missing. What has helped your mother and me is finding someone we can commiserate with, and having a large support system surrounding you can't hurt either." He looked at their current sentry, "You have all those things at your disposal back at Camp Jaha."

"Get some sleep." She said, needing to change the subject. "The sun will be up soon and it's going to be a long day."

Kane looked like he was about to argue, but he reconsidered and went to his pallet to get some rest. The weather was a little chilly, but with the small fire still burning and the mountain protecting them from the wind, the makeshift camp was comfortable. Clarke was fully awake now and restless. She put a couple more logs on the fire and set about gathering the materials for the morning.

As soon as the sun had breached the horizon the group awakened and resumed their grave digging. The sound of birds chirping added melody to the rhythmic _crunch- slide_ of five shovels. The ones who didn't have shovels were now guarding those that did, the cross making put aside temporarily. They made short work of the remaining graves, interring the bodies before the sun had a chance to fully sink again. Clarke wasn't sure what she expected to feel, maybe she was still numb. Maybe laying all these people to rest made no difference and she would forever be broken and haunted. Maybe she was never the good guy, and this emptiness was her punishment.

Because they weren't able to finish all the markers for the graves and whoever had startled Monty hadn't made their presence known, the group decided that one more night in the mountain was manageable. Now that the mountain was empty, the group decided to see what food was available in the kitchen. The Ark was a place where they never wasted anything, now there was an entire mountain full of resources and food that would go to waste if they weren't used.

"It seems a shame this place will go to waste." Miller said. "They have technology and facilities that would take us years- decades- to build."

"Not to mention the chocolate cake." Monty all but moaned, Jasper punched him in the arm playfully.

"Wouldn't it feel weird though? Living in a place that people just died in?" Octavia asked, appalled at the idea.

"The grounders believe that once a family dies, their earthly possessions, home included, should be reabsorbed into the village. The home is given to a new family, the possessions left are to be distributed to those who need it. There is nothing disrespectful about living in once inhabited quarters." Lincoln put his arm around Octavia.

"We did something similar on the Ark." Kane said, "We would divide up the sentimental items to any living relatives or friends, and the material things; clothes, bedding, toys, would go back into the community. The apartment would then be available for the next family unit. The mountain could be a great solution for a lot of our problems. We wouldn't have to worry about the elements, or invading on another tribe's territory, or whether we'd have enough bed space."

"Don't tell me you are actually considering moving everyone here! Do you really think that is a good idea?" Clarke asked, aghast.

"Logistically, it makes sense Clarke. Abby and I have discussed moving every one to the mountain, you have to remember that it was our initial plan. When we sent the 100 to Earth, our intention was for you all to live within Mount Weather. When we found out the mountain was occupied, that's when we made our contingency plan, Camp Jaha. Now that it isn't occupied-"

"Let me stop you there, Kane. These people didn't die so we could take their home. The sole purpose of pulling that lever was to save our people! _Not_ to get you a more comfortable bed!" Clarke yelled.

Bellamy was there, a hand on her arm, eyes imploring her to calm down. "Clarke, everyone knows that wasn't the reason we pulled the lever. Kane was just thinking out loud. Right Kane? We will not be moving into the mountain any time soon. We are just going to eat a hot meal tonight, finish the crosses and burial ceremony tomorrow, and then we'll head back to camp. Does that sound like a good plan?"

"Yeah. Don't forget, we also have to check out the woods, see if we actually had a visitor last night or if Monty is just jumpy." Clarke conceded.

"Right." Kane said. He was pensive and quiet the remainder of the night. The entire group had a big dinner, though they were still somber and aware of their surroundings. They didn't want to leave a guard alone at their camp, everyone had worked hard that day and deserved a hot meal with the others. When they were finished eating they cleaned up and went back to the camp to sleep. When they arrived at the door, something was wrong. The fire was completely put out, ashes doused in water and sand, and when the fire was re-lit they could see a message scrawled on the wall in charcoal:

_This isn't over._

"So, I guess I wasn't just imagining things, huh?" Monty said shakily.


	3. Chapter 3

They all stood, staring at the ominous writing.

"It must be Emerson." Clarke said. "He is the only one I know of that survived."

"He won't make a move on us while we have strength in numbers. From now on, nobody goes anywhere alone and we will have at least two standing guard at all times. Got it?" Bellamy asked.

"Do you really think he would make his intentions known if he wanted to kill us? He would have been better off if he had just picked us off one by one and not announced his presence." Kane thought aloud.

"He may not be in his right mind." Monty reasoned. "He _did_ just lose everyone he has ever known. His family, friends… all lost."

When the sun rose, they were all tired but alert. No one mentioned the distressed noises Monty made in his sleep or the fact that Clarke barely closed her eyes before jerking awake only to be soothed by Bellamy who hardly slept at all. The threat of danger lurking in the trees kept their eyes open and minds sharp. Now that all the bodies were buried, the group split into teams of four alternating between making crosses and standing guard. Once all the crosses were made, they gathered at the base of the makeshift cemetery and began their ceremony.

"In peace, may you leave the shore." Kane said solemnly.

"In love, may you find the next" said Miller

"And safe passage in your travels" Monty said, fighting to hold down his tears.

"Until your final journey to the ground" Bellamy said as he reached for Clarke's hand.

"May we meet again." They all said in unison.

Jasper and Monty were both silently crying, Clarke had turned into Bellamy's shoulder to regain her composure, Lincoln had his arm protectively around Octavia and Kane and Miller hung their heads in respectful silence.

Octavia said quietly, "The greatest griefs are those we cause ourselves. Sophocles." She noted half the group staring at her, clearly surprised. "What? I read. What do you think I did on the ark? I didn't exactly have a lot of options." The mood had lightened slightly and the group went throughout the graveyard, ensuring all the grave markers and ID cards were in place.

"Are we ready to go back to camp, now?" Kane asked once they finished their walk through. "If we leave now, we can make it back to camp before the sun sets and we can all get a full nights rest."

The group turned their attention to Clarke, the only one who hadn't yet agreed to go back to Camp Jaha. "I'll go with you guys." She said cautiously. "But I can't guarantee I will stay." She turned to Kane, "I am trying, here. I really am. If nothing else, at least I will go see my mom."

"She would like that, Clarke. Thank you."

They cleaned up their camp, making sure their fire was out and the door was shut before starting their hike home. They were making good time so half way home they took a small respite to eat and rest. Clarke had to use the bathroom. She stepped behind a large tree, out of view of the others, but within shouting distance. Before she could even get her pants unbuttoned, she heard something. She went into hyper-aware mode, searching the forest for anything out of place. Her eyes landed on a face caked in mud not 15 feet away. She recognized the face, despite its camouflage.

"Emerson." She greeted shoving down her fear. She knew all she needed to do was scream and the others would be there almost instantly. "We've buried them all. Their graves are clearly marked with their ID cards too." After a long pause she said, "I am so sorry."

"It's not over." Emerson said evenly.

"What else can there be? The mountain men are dead. You are the last one left! What are you going to do? Kill me? You should have done that while I was alone, before my people arrived. God knows I would have _let_ you."

"You silly child, you still don't get it. _Why_ would we still have missiles after what happened 97 years ago? We thought we were alone on the ground. Why would our grandfathers and great grandfathers set aside the tools of our destruction in our own post apocalyptic home? Not to destroy those we thought would never survive, but to protect ourselves. Have you heard of The City of Light?"

"Is that anything like the grounder's Polis?"

"No. That is a grounder city. The City of Light is fabled through out the grounder population as a type of Utopia. We know differently. The City of Light is named, not after the metaphorical meaning of light, but after the flash of a nuclear explosion. The City of Light is where the bombs _came_ from. No one is sure why someone in the city decided to destroy the world, but one thing is for certain, the silos from which the bombs came are still online. That's why we had a signal jammer running. Now that the mountain is off line, there may be someone coming to make sure everyone is dead. I hate you and the others from the Ark for what was done to my people, but I hate those responsible for the apocalypse more. I'd rather side with the enemy I know."

"Ok. What should we do? What will we be defending ourselves against?"

"You need to get the dam back up and running and you need to turn the signal jammer back on. You have engineers that are up to the task, right?"

"Yes, we should."

Emerson started walking away; Clarke reached for him "Emerson, I really am sorry. I never wanted to hurt anyone; I just wanted my people free."

"I know." He hung his head and disappeared into the woods.

"Do you think he was telling the truth?" Octavia stepped from behind a tree, startling Clarke.

"Yeah, Yeah, I do."


End file.
